family fear
I am always baffled at how scared other queer people are of elderly family members that they don't even like or depend on for money or housing. You have nothing to lose with these people, why are you afraid?
That's a frail person reliant on other people, not an apex predator. What are they gonna do? Call you a slur or deadname you? Just look at them and go "You got a big mouth for your big age." and let them embarrass themselves. They have no power, they can't hold shit over you, they can't even beat your ass up. Stop giving these people so much power in your mind.
It's another thing if it is someone you genuinely loved, admired, or depend on. But without any of that, come on!